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Post by maxwell on May 7, 2012 13:49:03 GMT -5
I posted up a thread on here last week about my dogs sleep aggression, he still has this, but it's not that noticeable now he is happy with his own bed..
But just lately I have realised that he will only show affection if there is something in it for him, ie food..
He's very independent, he likes to spend a lot of his time on his bed, the only time he will get up on the sofa with me is if its almost his dinner time, or I have something in the oven and he's hanging around for that.
He will jump on on the sofa, and keep touching me with his paw! I always give him some of my dinner, but he knows he has to wait until iv finished and I will only give him a small amount in his bowl when im done, nothing to much!
But as soon as he's hung around, got what he wanted off he goes back to his bed.. then it occurred to me, that the only time he will come sit with me ect, is all related to whether there is the promise of some food.. and the problem is just getting worse and worse..
Im now trying to not give him any of my food, to try and train this begging out of him, but now he just creates and its driving me nuts.. and getting me down!
I wondered if this was normal behaviour in the first months? has he not bonded with me yet seeing as he will only trade affection for food?
Any advice would be great...
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Post by Deleted on May 7, 2012 14:22:15 GMT -5
It's not just hounds ... it's dogs really - they are total opportunists and there has to be something in it for them. ;D Personally, if you like to give him a treat after you've eaten I wouldn't stop this, but would withhold it until he's shut up, no matter how long that takes. I may be explaining something you already know, but if you 'give in' to shut him up, you'll teach him it's worth whining for a little bit longer next time ... and so on. Giving him the treat on your terms should stop the problem, but you will need to grit your teeth and ignore him totally when he starts. Attention (even the 'shut up' sort) can encourage him to continue, so the best way is for him to get no reaction whatsoever. He is behaving completely naturally. Although some dogs will appear to have settled and bonded quite quickly, in reality I believe it takes up to two years for rescue dog to truly become yours - when I look back I'm always amazed at the difference from the first few months. Not all dogs are cuddlers anyway - my Flint (the lurcher in my sig) has been with me five years and has always greeted me in the morning and when I come home. He now may ask for a fuss at other odd times but this took about 3 years to happen and if I sit beside him on the sofa to stroke him he'll generally move away. If I have something fishy then it's a completely different story. ;D I would just let your hound have space and leave him to come to you - it will happen.  |
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Post by Flaperoo on May 7, 2012 14:29:11 GMT -5
Please don 't despair. I haven't read your previous thread about agression but if he waits for you to finish it doesn't appear to be agression towards you. Bonding with an ex racing greyhound can be easy or take a very long time. I have had six over the years; four bonded almost instantly, one took six months for him to show any sign of connection with us and Peggy (my 11 year old bitch) still treats us with contempt and we can only cuddle her when she asks for it (VERY UNUSAL). Flash who took six months turned into a complete heart dog (love of my life). Peggy, the one who is just independently quirky is like an arm's length lover; there but never totally comitted in case something better comes along  . I can't begin to describe though how much over the years I have grown to love this unappreciative, unresponsive, ungrateful madam. I don't know how long you have had him but give him some time. Your need for him to be affectionate towards you is about your needs not his - to him it is not a problem because he most likely has been subconsciously rewarded for being a good boy, eating his food and going away not bothering any one. Do you have a crate? If so put him in it whilst you are eating and only let him eat food from your finished plate (if you want to do this), away from where you are eating - in the kitchen or into his food bowl. We never allow any of ours to eat our left overs other than in the kitchen - this gives them a signal that we are finished and we are giving them permission to have what is left (this different to begging) and gives them a clear message that they are lower in the pecking order than us. I would say do not not give him tit bits from your plate, this will only encourage the behaviour. Take it into the kitchen and chuck it in the bin unless he does something (sit?paw/down) that he connecst with getting a reward. Dogs are pack animals and it is important you become pack leader - I think he is a bit confused about this. Do not be in a hurry to cuddle or lavish praise on him. When you become pack leader he will come to you. The fantastic thing about being a greyhound owner is to watch their progress from being a kennel dog to a pet. The rewards at the end of the journey are truly priceless and rank amongst the most joyous moments of my life  . Be patient - don't try too hard (ignore him if neccessary), don't expect anything. If your expections of him are lower you will probably soon find he will exceed them  Maryx |
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Post by samburns on May 7, 2012 14:54:18 GMT -5
I would say it is normal, sadly  I say sadly because most greyhounds don't understand anything about affection because they are not used to it During a greyhound's racing life the human touch he gets is 'practical' - moving him from place to place, handed over for someone to stick him in the traps, medical treatment maybe.... Food is usually VERY exciting for them because all they have ever known is a very bland diet of soaked kibble......many of them will rarely have had any treats while in kennels It really does take time for some greyhounds to 'understand' affection. It also takes time for them to really bond. One of the real joys of owning greyhounds is living through this process and watching them learn to love life, relax and trust I think quite fundamentally greyhounds don't enjoy being 'petted' in the same way as some other breeds of dogs  Most of them enjoy an 'ear rub', although some are very sensitive about their ears from being tatoo'd. They tend to like a gentle stroke under their chin and a bit of a gentle scratch around their shoulders When they are ready to accept affection they have a sweet endearing way of coming over to you when you are sitting and just moving in, hovering, looking at you kind of like if you were having a first date with someone and hesitating about whether its the time for a kiss ;D ;D ;D If your lad is very food motivated you might be able to tap into that with some basic training to build on your bond |
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Post by tinar on May 8, 2012 2:10:23 GMT -5
I would say it is normal, sadly When they are ready to accept affection they have a sweet endearing way of coming over to you when you are sitting and just moving in, hovering, looking at you kind of like if you were having a first date with someone and hesitating about whether its the time for a kiss ;D ;D ;D What a lovely description - it makes me love these gentle hounds even more |
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Post by loopylou on May 8, 2012 3:07:48 GMT -5
Great description Sam I was only saying to someone at the show that my Greyhound girl Tia is not at all affectionate unless there is something in it for her i.e.treats. Then she drives me mad , licking me, jumping around , whining etc.She's very independent and not cuddly.Which is why I took her to the show without any of the others , to spend some one to one time with her.It was great and I think she enjoyed it too.After three and a half years I'm used to her ways and actually admire her independence and love the bones of her for it. She has just started to come for an ear rub now and then and it is extra special because of how she is.It's early days for you as yet , you will find a balance that will work for you both. |
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Post by Emma on May 8, 2012 4:15:20 GMT -5
It's not just greys, my little terrier was very independent when we had her, she wasn't even interested in us when we had food As he does have interest when food is around, you can make this work for you to get him used to being close to you and he's associating you with good things, so will show affection in his own way when he's ready. As an aside, treat based dog training is structured bribery ;D, but it works, so start putting a few basic commands to treats and see how he gets on, training is a very quick way to build a bond with a new dog, as you learn together Emma x |
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Post by Farrav on May 8, 2012 5:50:02 GMT -5
When I had my first greyhound she wouldn't take treats from my hand which puzzled me, but this was completely alien to her as it just never happens in a racing environment--I have to say that she learnt very quickly. ;D
Give him time everything is new to him.
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Post by maxwell on May 8, 2012 5:53:51 GMT -5
Thank you for the excellent replies, some great advice!
I should add that I've had him now just under 4 months, and if im honest, I went in a bit nieve! I wasn't prepared for the training ahead. But he is picking things up really quickly, the toilet training took a few weeks, but now I have to say he's excellent now with that..
I have spoilt him, he gets a lot of treats, now I have cut that back, and when I now give him one i will make him wait until I give him the command to take it, again this only took a few hours to train him on..
If I go out, I have to bring a treat back, as now he expects it.. if I dont boy does he sulk! and when people come round they to bring him a treat...
I work from home, so we are pretty much together all the time! he does like to play a lot though, im not sure if play fighting is good for them, but he loves it and goes crazy!
But yesterday the penny dropped and I sussed it that he will only come and lay with me ect is if there is food knocking around..
But its still very early days.. as suggested I will just give him his space, and let him ajust in his own time, perhaps my expectations were a lil high.. that was great advice!
Max
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Post by tinar on May 8, 2012 12:17:19 GMT -5
When I had my first greyhound she wouldn't take treats from my hand which puzzled me, but this was completely alien to her as it just never happens in a racing environment--I have to say that she learnt very quickly. ;D Give him time everything is new to him. Daley is like this - he looks at you suspiciously if you offer him a treat....'Whatcha tryin to poison me with?' |
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Post by jodav on May 8, 2012 14:37:33 GMT -5
The fantastic thing about being a greyhound owner is to watch their progress from being a kennel dog to a pet. The rewards at the end of the journey are truly priceless and rank amongst the most joyous moments of my life Couldn't agree more Training a dog from a puppy is great but a kennel dog to a pet is something special  Jo x |
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Post by Deleted on May 8, 2012 16:31:38 GMT -5
Max - if your greyhound enjoys play fighting with you then it seems to me that he's bonding with you and showing affection in that way |
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Post by vickyb on May 8, 2012 17:21:22 GMT -5
I think we all decide just what's acceptable to us re begging, treats etc. Mine all get a dentastix type treat when I go out as it keeps then occupied for those first few mins (or seconds lol) and they don't bark or bother when I leave now and often but not always they get something when I come in. They've trained me that they get something when we eat, Gracie did that so cleverly i never realised I was being trained until it was too late ;D  We've taught them all to sit and give paw for treats but it backfired with Sapphy, she's so food obsessed that she tries too hard and ends up giving you both paws but overbalances so they end up raking down your body . She's landed in her water too when doing it nearby . |
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